Dragonball Evolution: The Worst of All Time

How is it possible, that the greatest show of all time, a show that should not have even ever been made into a live action movie unless over 500 million dollars were spent making the effects and all the props etc. How is it possible, that it be made into a movie which I rightfully have the power to grant it the tittle of the worst movie of all time? Last weekend, I gave this movie a chance, even though I had seen the previews and felt thoroughly disgusted, but I thought that it honestly couldn't be that bad.

Five minutes. That's all I saw from this movie. I feel insulted. I was sitting in a theater filled with people who were actually liking this movie. How? I couldn't understand. But then again, they never were, or will be on my level, so to them it was a nice movie. I don't know exactly where to begin with this train wreck. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that the greatest hero in any show, Goku, the man who wears nothing but the simplest of traditional Japanese clothing, not f*cking pair of faded jeans and a brand name Tee. What's more, the guy never went to school, he was just too badass, he spent all his days advancing his martial arts skills. What's more, he was never picked on, in the movie, they depicted him as a stupid little nerd who was picked on by everyone else at the high school. I couldn't take it anymore, at this point, they had to stop the movie and bring in an ambulance because I had started punching people in the face indiscriminately from how pissed off I was. Maybe that's not exactly how it went, but nevertheless I was ready to leave a few seconds past the opening credits.

I still don't understand why I wasn't called to write the script. In fact, I should have directed this movie, honestly, I would have led this movie to win every single Grammy, in every single category. The first movie to ever accomplish something like that. Instead this movie will fail miserably at the Box Office, be forgotten and the DVDs will gather dust on Wall Mart shelves and Dragonball Z's reputation will forever be tarnished. A great injustice has been committed. The punishment should be severe. I'm willing to bet that most of the actors in the movie itself haven't ever even watched a single episode of Dragonball Z. Honestly? They would stoop that low? Why? Why did they shoot a bullet through the dignity of Dragonball Z like that? Was it necessary to disrespect all the fans like that?

Worst movie of all time, no questions asked. I have to go do something less painful, like pry my fingernails out with a staple remover.